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Coaching NLP

NLP Now – The Meta Model

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We talk to people, we communicate, using words, gestures, body movements, eye movements, tonality, it is how we understand each other, pass on information and gather information. It is  a whole body experience. We use language to express our thoughts and our experiences.

We have seen in the articles “NLP Now – The Map is Not the Territory” understanding George Miller’s 7 +/- 2 model of acquiring information, and “NLP Now – Surface Structure Deep Structure“, that the human mind will delete, distort and generalise information, as we absorb or take information in, and as we communicate our thoughts and experiences to others.

meta milton model iceberg effect
Meta, Milton model iceberg effect

It was Richard Bandler’s and John Grinder’s, the co-founders of NLP, observations and learnings from Milton H Erickson, Virginia Satir et al, that helped them understand language, the rules we use, the linguistics and transformational grammar, that the Meta Model came, and resulted in the 1975 book “The Structure of Magic“.

The Meta Model (click to understand the structure of the Meta Model) gives us the structure to notice what is missing from our own or other peoples understanding of the world, and the questions that will help us or them retrieve this missing information.

When we see something (V – visual), there are billions of pieces of information bombarding us at any one time. Reading this article, there are the words on the screen or on the paper if you have printed the article. How about the words you have already read, the words yet to be read, the area around the article, the walls of the room, the floor the ceiling, the colours, all the items on the table, these are still being absorbed into your brain, although you are not consciously aware of them all.

You delete these from your awareness.

As you are reading this article, there are sounds (A- auditory) that are there, perhaps sounds of cars, traffic, the sound of the fridge in the kitchen, the sounds of the clock. Many of these sounds are deleted from our awareness, although being absorbed into our inner mind.

There are smells, (O – olfactory), in the room or space you are occupying,maybe the polish someone use to clean, maybe the smell of the next meal cooking. You are not aware of these until they are mentioned.

The taste (G – gustatory) in your mouth, until I mentioned this, perhaps you were not aware of them.

How about your feet on the floor, (K – kinesthetic). Until I mentioned the feelings, one would assume that there would be no conscious knowledge of the. The hair on your head. Are you now aware of the hair?

We delete a lot of information or details as we acquire data, although at a non conscious level, this information is absorbed, our conscious world is depleted of this information.

It is the work of the NLP Practitioner to help the client to enrich their world with this missing information, to go to the deep structure, to chunk down to acquire knowledge and understanding, should it be needed and appropriate.

When a person or client communicates information, they (and we) will also delete information. for example:-

“Colin read a book”

there is a lot of missing information, which Colin, where did he read the book, what book did he read, how fast did he read, did he PhotoRead the book?

Again, it is the work of the NLP Practitioner to acquire or retrieve this information so that we or the client  has a better understanding of what is being said.

When the client or we take this information, we have to go on a Transderivational Search, go into our past experiences to make sense, to get an understanding, of what has been said, and often we distort this original information to fit our world, our understanding.

Consider the next sentence.

“She hit me.”

What do you understand? You will have come-up with an understanding of what was meant by this statement.

That resultant understanding will probably become the truth as you understand it, we therefore generalise this belief as the truth, and it is not, as there is a lot of missing information, as to how hard she hit me, with what did she hit me, and where did she hit me.

By using the Meta Model, we can chunk down, go to the deep structure, retrieve missing information, to obtain a full picture, a full understanding.

Articles investigating the language patterns used in the Meta Model. Click here.

Categories
Culture Thoughts Travels

Norbiton Hall, Kingston upon Thames

Ten years ago, we gave up living on a boat, our Dicken’s Class 50′ ocean going vessel named Mr Toots, (click to see), and swapped her, with a friend Richard Morris, for our flat. Where are you now Richard?

I have often wondered where the name of the estate with 192 flats, Norbiton Hall came from. Here is what I have found out.Norbiton Hall aerial viewNorbiton Hall aerial view

The first clue obviously is that the estate is in the village or district of the Royal Borough of Kingston upon Thames, (Click to view film), called Norbiton, south west of London, and within the M25 motorway.

Another clue is a blue plaque on the outer wall of the flats which says:-

Plaque of Norbiton Hall
Plaque of Norbiton Hall

HERE FORMALLY STOOD NORBITON HALL
BUILT IN THE 16TH CENTURY ON LOVEKYN’S CHAPEL LAND
IT HAS BEEN THE RESIDENCE OF
RICHARD TAVERNER
GEORGE EVELYN
MR ANTONY BENN
THE COUNTESS OF LIVERPOOL
AMONG OTHERS

I decided to research in the library and museum. What was here before these flats?

The first records I found for Norbiton was for 1174 when Henry II bestowed the Manor of North Barton to the Knights of Anjou. The word Barton I suspect being derived from the Saxon word “beartun”, meaning to store grain.

Lovekyn  plaque
Lovekyn Chapel

In 1309 Edward Lovekyn founded Lovekyn Chapel, still standing and in use opposite the end of Old London Road, and standing in the grounds of Tiffins Grammar School, at the start of London Road. It is said that most of the lands in the area belonged to Lovekyn at that time.

The plaque on the wall of the chapel says :-

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Lovekyn Chapel plaque

“The Lovekyn Chapel founded 1309 by Edward Lovekyn bailiff and member of the butchers’ company of Kingston: rebuilt and re-endowed 1352 by John Lovekyn stock-fishmonger and Alderman and four times Lord Mayor of London: confiscated to the Crown 1535 granted to the Kingston Grammar School 1561 by Queen Elizabeth.”

There is mentioned that in 1532 a certain Mr Erasmus Ford who owned the land, complained bitterly to King Henry VIII, as some of King’s men had cut down 35 prime elms, it is presupposed to help built Hampton Court, which is not far away from Norbiton and Kingston, up the River Thames.

The Evelyn family in 1588 used the property to store and make gunpowder.

What building existed then could not be found, but there is reference of a building in 1631 as being newly built in brick and had 13 hearths. There is mention of the Jenkinson family owning Norbiton Hall in 1681 when major renovation and alteration was undertaken, saying that 43 persons could be comfortable sat for diner.

There were two large estates in the area, the one I researched Norbiton Hall, and the other which should not be confused with the Hall, which was Norbiton House or Place, the two estates divided by the London Road. Both areas prior to the 19th century being primarily agricultural land.

Norbiton Hall‘s grounds were to the north of London Road, the road was said prior to adoption by the local authority a difficult place to negotiate, as carts would become stuck for hours from the resultant mud and ruts after rain.

Norbiton House or Place was to the south of London Road, bordered by Cambridge Road and Coombe Road. The house and grounds were palatial, with the owner a rich merchant, a Mr Pallmer, trading in the West Indies, spending most of his money on the estate, eventually becoming bankrupt. He would open the grounds for the public to enjoy at weekends. The house was of more grandeur than the buildings at Norbiton Hall, having 23 hearths.

Old Norbiton Hall
Old Norbiton Hall
Old Norbiton Hall
Old Norbiton Hall

Opposite Norbiton Hall is St Peters Church, which was built in 1842 by Gilbert Scott in the Norman Style.

It was at this time that big changes started to occur in the area. By 1838 the Enclosure Commissioners alloted land from Norbiton Hall for development, and with the introduction of the railway line to Kingston and Maldon, the Norbiton Hall estate was split into two and got smaller. By 1873 there was only 12 acres left, and in 1882-4 the then owner drove a road though the estate calling it Birkenhead Avenue, named after the families favourite town. Land was sold in small plots to build houses adjoining the new Avenue.

In 1829 the estate was purchased by Mary, Countess of Liverpool, and her cousin Robert Jenkinson who was Lieutenant of Dover Castle, a well to do man, and was known as the squire. He died in the mid 1850s. The Countess died 1846. Lord Liverpool who died a year before the purchase was Prime Minister for 15 years, and was responsible for the erection of Kingston Bridge, the first stone being laid 1825 and opened 1828, replacing an earlier bridge which was documented crossing the Thames since 1219.

Norbiton Hall was acquired from John Guy 1864 by William Hardman, for 8000 guineas, he was to become Mayor of Kingston, magistrate and recorder, and was knighted in 1885. As a justice he had rooms in the hall which he used to hear cases against local villains on a daily basis.

In 1884 Norbiton Hall was advertised for sale with 4 servants bedrooms, 5 best bedrooms, dressing and bathroom, drawing dining morning and billiard room, library breakfast room. But the grounds were only 2 acres left and sold in lots.

A Mr E J Cave lived in the house for an annual rent of £200, and in 1884 brought the house for £3500, but it went into a long decline.

In 1933 a planning application was submitted for the land to be to become a dog racing track but was rejected by council, and subsequently by the government on appeal. Soon after the hall was demolished to make way for the 192 to flats as we see them today.

Old Norbiton Hall

The back of Norbiton Hall, in Birkenhead Avenue.

Front of Norbiton Hall
Front of Norbiton Hall

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Same position about 1925 with post box and tram lines

Norbiton Hall c. 1930 Norbiton Hall c. 1930

Old Photographs Copyright R.H.Byran
Reproduced with permission and fee from
Kingston Museum April 2007

See a film of Kingston upon Thames taken on a sunny day in April 2007, click here.

See Pictures of the London Road flooded in July 2007, click here.

See aerial view of Norbiton Hall, click
here.

See Cycling Improvements in London Road, Kingston