We talk to people, we communicate, using words, gestures, body movements, eye movements, tonality, it is how we understand each other, pass on information and gather information. It is a whole body experience. We use language to express our thoughts and our experiences.
We have seen in the articles “NLP Now – The Map is Not the Territory” understanding George Miller’s 7 +/- 2 model of acquiring information, and “NLP Now – Surface Structure Deep Structure“, that the human mind will delete, distort and generalise information, as we absorb or take information in, and as we communicate our thoughts and experiences to others.
It was Richard Bandler’s and John Grinder’s, the co-founders of NLP, observations and learnings from Milton H Erickson, Virginia Satir et al, that helped them understand language, the rules we use, the linguistics and transformational grammar, that the Meta Model came, and resulted in the 1975 book “The Structure of Magic“.
The Meta Model(click to understand the structure of the Meta Model)gives us the structure to notice what is missing from our own or other peoples understanding of the world, and the questions that will help us or them retrieve this missing information.
When we see something (V – visual), there are billions of pieces of information bombarding us at any one time. Reading this article, there are the words on the screen or on the paper if you have printed the article. How about the words you have already read, the words yet to be read, the area around the article, the walls of the room, the floor the ceiling, the colours, all the items on the table, these are still being absorbed into your brain, although you are not consciously aware of them all.
You delete these from your awareness.
As you are reading this article, there are sounds (A- auditory) that are there, perhaps sounds of cars, traffic, the sound of the fridge in the kitchen, the sounds of the clock. Many of these sounds are deleted from our awareness, although being absorbed into our inner mind.
There are smells, (O – olfactory), in the room or space you are occupying,maybe the polish someone use to clean, maybe the smell of the next meal cooking. You are not aware of these until they are mentioned.
The taste (G – gustatory) in your mouth, until I mentioned this, perhaps you were not aware of them.
How about your feet on the floor, (K – kinesthetic). Until I mentioned the feelings, one would assume that there would be no conscious knowledge of the. The hair on your head. Are you now aware of the hair?
We delete a lot of information or details as we acquire data, although at a non conscious level, this information is absorbed, our conscious world is depleted of this information.
It is the work of the NLP Practitioner to help the client to enrich their world with this missing information, to go to the deep structure, to chunk down to acquire knowledge and understanding, should it be needed and appropriate.
When a person or client communicates information, they (and we) will also delete information. for example:-
“Colin read a book”
there is a lot of missing information, which Colin, where did he read the book, what book did he read, how fast did he read, did he PhotoRead the book?
Again, it is the work of the NLP Practitioner to acquire or retrieve this information so that we or the client has a better understanding of what is being said.
When the client or we take this information, we have to go on a Transderivational Search, go into our past experiences to make sense, to get an understanding, of what has been said, and often we distort this original information to fit our world, our understanding.
Consider the next sentence.
“She hit me.”
What do you understand? You will have come-up with an understanding of what was meant by this statement.
That resultant understanding will probably become the truth as you understand it, we therefore generalise this belief as the truth, and it is not, as there is a lot of missing information, as to how hard she hit me, with what did she hit me, and where did she hit me.
By using the Meta Model, we can chunk down, go to the deep structure, retrieve missing information, to obtain a full picture, a full understanding.
Articles investigating the language patterns used in the Meta Model. Click here.
Today I had a telephone conversation with a gentleman in the UK about taking/participating in NLP courses, and the vast numbers of trainers offering trainings. Could I advise him? How he could become good at NLP? what was the correct path to take?
My strategy has been to go to the originators, the developers, those that hold the intellectual rights to the technologies I want to learn. See articles of my journey of learning, click. I do not want to learn from someone who has read a book, heard from someone else, or who has plagiarised someone else’s work. I respect others knowledge, give credit when required, and seek official accreditation to teach their work as a licensed or certified trainer.
I told him that if he could, why not attend a course given by Richard Bandler himself on NLP, there would be many hundreds of people on the course, which the gentleman did not like, he wanted a smaller participant number.
Why not come to Turkey? The courses are much cheaper. Accommodation is very much cheaper and flights are very cheap.
What a great idea. Come to Turkey to attend the next Certified, Society of NLP Practitioner course, given by my good self, here in Istanbul.
I am running a number of courses in the next few weeks, in conjunction with NLPGrup.
Society of NLP Practitioner 9 July – 15 July
PhotoReading 30 June – 1 July
Mind Maps 8 July
Others are following over the next few months.
All courses are given in English, I speak only English, and there is translation into Turkish.
Sunday saw the end of the NLP Master Practitioner Course here in a very hot Istanbul. Not only was the weather hot, but we lost electricity for the whole day, as workers dug up the street below our window.
It is always sad to end a nine day course, as the participants share a lot of experiences together as they learn and make any changes they wanted. As always people took a time to leave the building, like loosing an old friend. NLP, remove a deep seated phobia.
A couple of years ago I attended Harvard Business School, and from the Strategic Negotiation Course, perhaps one of the hardest courses I have every attended, but enjoyable, we learned the model BATNA, standing for “best alternative to a negotiated agreement“.
From their book Getting to Yes: Negotiating Without Giving In, Roger Fisher and William Ury created the term BATNA.
A BATNA is determined by knowing each parties upper and lower points at which they would walk away from an agreement, and will result in a course of action that will be taken by a either party if the current negotiations fail and an agreement cannot be reached.
In basic terms, when in negotiation, if the proposed agreement is better than your BATNA, then you should accept it, whereas if the proposed agreement is worse than your BATNA, you should walk away, or reopen negotiations. If you cannot improve the agreement, then you should at least consider withdrawing from the negotiations and pursuing your alternatives.
When in negotiation, one should also consider the other party’s BATNA, to come to an agreement that is a Win Win situation. That is to say that neither party looses in the agreement.
The BATNA can protect you both parties from accepting terms that are too unfavorable and from rejecting terms it would be in your interest to accept.
Many considerations should be made in constructing a BATNA, not just money or value, maybe payment terms, add-on value such as guarantees, delivery, suitability, needs, etc.
I am in Istanbul this week, giving a NLP Master Practitioner course and three sessions of NLP to participants learning English. This means I am in-front of the participants from 9am till 7pm, with under an hours break for lunch.
This is enough to make anyone tired, but on top of this the weather is so hot, above 30 I believe. Add to this thirteen people in an enclosed space makes it even warmer, too much for the air conditioning to cope well.
I have now resorted to wearing sandals, and yesterday I got myself a pair of shorts, now the participants can see my short, fat, hairy legs. What a sight I must look, but I must keep cool, and none of the women wear socks and have bare legs, therefore I too can have. Equal rights for men.
Last night after finishing with the English language participants at 7pm, I fell into a bean bag seat we have in the classroom, just to rest my legs and aching back. This next thing I remember was suddenly waking-up half an hour later seeing pink every where. Where was I, for a fleeting moment I had no idea where I was. For another fifteen minutes I lay on the floor wrapped in the bean bag, unable to move, the heat had drained my energy.
Oh Poo Poo. (click to read) That’s me. I will need to go home, to a cooler UK. If only I could.
Internet access is an issue for me at the moment. It is difficult to find the time or an access point, as I am working, preparing other work, people wanting my time, so my blogs are suffering. Apologies to those who follow daily. I will take time for myself to relax, unwind, rest and get some sleep.
I traveled to Istanbul on Friday to give a NLP Master Practitioner course, but the aircraft arrived slightly late, at 10:30pm. I was worried that Salim the driver would be in trouble waiting for me.
I left arrivals hall, to be met by Salim, who speaks little English, saying something about ambulance.
Then I realised. Waiting for me was an ambulance to take me to my hotel in Kadikoy.
Down the motorways we raced, lights flashing, cars moving out of the way.
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