Categories
English Sayings NLP Thoughts

Keep your mouth shut

There is a saying in English which says “keep your mouth shut“.

It is what it says, to stay quiet, not to say anything, to keep your thoughts to yourself.

Often it is the best medicine, the best thing to do, because you can “dig the hole deeper“, you can create situations, arguments which get worse and worse, driving the conversation deeper and deeper, entrenching people firmly into their beliefs.

I have found myself on many occasions where I have been in conversation, maybe in the training room, maybe in debates, and I have said something which I believe to be true from my experience, from my life, from my culture, from my religion, only to suddenly realise I have said something wrong, to person or persons I am in conversation with, who disagree with my ideas, as my understanding, my culture does not fit theirs.

It is time like this that I wish I had kept my mouth shut, not said what I did. For now I have upset someone.

But then sometimes, like a fool, I will “stick to my guns“, I will “stand my corner“, I will argue my case, defend my point of view. Not only do I defend my argument, but so does the person I am in conversation with stick with theirs.

What happens next? An argument ensues. People start to get upset, and the more upset they become the “deeper the hole gets“, the worse the argument gets.

I have lost count of the times I have entered a debate, a conversation, only to realise I should not be involved, because our views are so wide, our understandings, our beliefs, our cultures are so wide, that they will never, with all the good will in the world, merge.

I come across this sometimes in my courses. One participant is so anti the subject, does not believe that the subject is right, that the subject is against their morals and culture, that nothing I say is correct.

Why did they enroll on the course in the first place?

It is then that I will suggest that the person leaves the course, and I will refund their fees. (Subject to this occurring on the first day.)

Sometimes I get emails where I am attacked, because my, like others, methods of delivering the subject matter does not fit the ideals of the writer.

I will never win.

If I say black they will say white. If I say white they will say black.

If I say “I like that“, they will say “No, it is terrible“.

Then there are the people who always know better, have done better, been there or done more, always have the best solution, and there can be no other. They do not believe that others can have their point of view, beliefs or culture.

These people know the best restaurants, the best shops, the best way to get from one place to another. They will know which is the best product to buy, the best flower to plant in the garden, and if you say different, then you are in trouble.

I am aware of these people, and sometimes hear myself becoming one, and have to stop myself, to keep my mouth shut.

Yes, one should express a point of view, it should be everyones right, and it should be everyones right to be given that right to express an opinion, and have it that opinion considered.

But when it will lead to arguments, to bad feelings, rightly or wrongly, I will walk away, and keep my mouth shut.

Each and everyone of us will have our own “cat on the mat“, our own beliefs, ways of doing things, as we process information, go on that transderivational search, to make sense of our world.

The trouble is, some peoples cats are so big, they get so involved in their cat, that result is they can only see their cat, it obstructs the view of a big world of possibilities out there.



Our internal voice need to shut-up too

Categories
Uncategorized

News article in Turkish

Not only have I been mentioned on a TV program, but I have just been sent this article from a Turkish Newspaper.

Again I hope it is good.



News article from Turkey.

Categories
NLP

A mention on TV

Today I was sent a link to a video of an interview made for TV by Mehpare Şayan Kileci of GAP Consultancy in Turkey.

For my Turkish readers I have placed a link for you to view the video, and perhaps tell me what is being said.

I know I am mentioned towards the end of the interview, and it would be good to know if it is good things. Knowing Mehpare, it would nothing else but good.

So yes Jean-Daniel, (click to see previous article) it would be better if I spoke another language other than English, then I would understand the video.


 
Click here to view video

Kariyerinizde yeni fırsatlar yaratmanız ve tüm güncel insan kaynakları yönetimi uygulamalarını kapsayan “İnsan Kaynakları Yönetimi” kursu 06 Ocak 2009 tarihinde başlıyor. GAP Özel İstihdam Bürosu Yönetim Kurulu Başkanı Mehpare Şayan Kileci, Medyantep TV mikrofonları aracılığıyla kurs hakkında bilgi verdi.

Categories
Thoughts

What is the real thing?

Some time ago, a friend was given a very personal gift, a gold plated watch.

The friend wore the watch with pride, she was always telling people the time without being asked, thrusting the wrist out in front of people, so that they would notice the gift.

People would notice the watch. It was not over haughty, over fashionable, it just looked good on her wrist.

I think it also marked a transition in her life, as she left behind her the old teenage watch days, to enter into the age of adult watches.

My friend would hardly ever go out without wearing the watch, she had become really attached to it, it became part of her life.

Over a small period of time, it became apparent that some of the shine, some of the luster, had begun to be lost on the gold plate. It was hard to notice, but the signs were. Something was not right.

She was advised to take the watch back to the shop where her partner had purchased special gift, but she would not go, and the gold began to become dimmer, the shine was lost.

She wore the watch less and less.

It was some time on that my friend realised that there was something missing in her life. The special watch had been discarded, it was gathering dust on the dressing table in her bedroom.

She realised that the watch was not only special, it made her special too, as it changed her personality when she wore it, she became more sophisticated, more womanly, it made her feel special, and it brought back such good memories.

She decided to take the watch back to the shop whence it was purchased, only to find the shop had closed down.

It seemed that, that part of her life had now been broken, it was now lost.

Not to loose that part of her, she searched for another dealer, the distributor of the brand of watches, and took it to them, and it was decided there and then that there was a problem, but it could be sorted out, and it would take thirty days.

The thirty days passed, the watch was not returned. The technical people said the gold plating could not be reapplied, so they would replace the watch case with the same model.

My friend would have her special watch back.

The crystal glass, the gold face and hands, the twenty-one jeweled movement would be placed into a new casing.

She would get back that special gift that marked such a change in her life.

This makes me think.

Although identical in every way, which was the special watch? That gift that meant so much her and her partner?

The old case that now lies in the rubbish dump never to be seen again, or, the new one that adorns her wrist?

Categories
Recommendation

GIZMO Internet phone, free telephone and cheap calls

In the article The cost of a telephone call I mentioned one of the internet VoIP telephone systems call GIZMO.

Here is your chance to try it, because you never know, you may like it.

You can access GizmoCall by visiting the web site www.gizmocall.com . There is no software to download, so you can start right away.

You can use the telephone below to make a call, just key in the number and Bob’s your Uncle.

You will have to register, giving yourself a user name, and if you wish, put a few $’s into a pot so you can make cheap calls all over the world.

If your friends also register with GIZMO then no matter where they are in the world, you can talk for free.

An added advantage to GIZMO is that if both friends have money in the pot, say only $10, it is possible to call each other on a mobile or land line at no cost. No fee. Just dial from your GIZMO account your friends registered telephone number, and you get connect free of charge. (see web site for full details)

My GIZMO name id PhillipHolt .My GIZMO telephone number, accessible from any phone is 0044 203 355 2550. Good luck.




Categories
English Sayings

Bob’s your Uncle

Thank you Ahmad El-bahri for your comment in the article The cost of a telephone call.

The English really do have strange sayings, and often giving courses in non UK countries, I come out with a saying we would intuitively use in the UK, and I get a look of :-

                        “What are you taking about? How am I going to translate that?“

from my translator. A look of total confusion colours their faces.

I should not say these phrases, but it all adds to the rich tapestry of the information I an imparting to the participants.

So I have to explain.

“Bob’s your Uncle,” is said when an action or explanation is finished or could be finished, in a very easy way.

Perhaps we will be asked to explain how do something, say bake a chocolate cake.

The process of getting the ingredients, mixing them, baking the cake will be explained, and when that explanation has finished the person will signal thats the end, there is no more information to be said with, “Bob’s your Uncle“, also implying that there can be no failure in producing the chocolate cake.

  

Categories
Recommendation Thoughts Travels

The cost of a telephone call

Traveling as much as I do to different parts of the world, means staying in communication is and has been extremely difficult and costly.

My good friend, Bill Robertson, once said that he had a telephone book just for me, as I was forever having a new contact telephone number.

Not only that, his first words to me would be, “Where are you today?”  Poor Bill never knew where I was.

Regarding my telephone numbers, yes I moved about from home to home as employment and circumstances changed. With a land line telephone, that meant a new telephone number.

With the advent of the mobile telephone, allowing us to be mobile in our daily life, our home location telephone system soon became irrelevant. It is more and more common these days for people not to have a fixed land line telephone, relying solely on mobile phones.

Problem solved for Bill, all he had to do is remember my mobile phone number. (+44) 07973178602.

Problem for me was that if I was in a country other than the UK, when receiving Bill’s calls, I would pay a fortune, an add-on international phone charge just to receive his call.

Now, I do not mind paying that extra to speak to Bill, but I do object to paying for “cold sales” calls, wanting to sell me a new mobile phone, an insurance policy, advertising space, to sell our timeshare or replacement windows.

My first solution to this problem was to obtain a sim card, a mobile number for the country I am visiting, that I can insert into a spare phone I carry around with me.

Problem solved, poor old Bill  will have more numbers for me to remember or write in his little black book, plus he would have to pay the international call charge for the privilege of speaking to me. Plus I would have to spend a fortune telling people of my foreign telephone number.

But this is a problem for me, as I do not want a contract with a foreign (non UK) phone company, paying a monthly fee, and a “Pay-as-you-go” service is OK, but if the number is not used for say three months, you loose the number and any credits I may have.

Then came VoIP, a revolution in communication, using the internet to make telephone calls. This system was all well for technical minded people, who could get their heads around SIP codes and numbers, proxy servers, RTD port. etc. Not very intuitive or easy to use for the general public, and special equipment was required.

As usual, it was someone who knew the KISS acronym, a seemingly simple piece of software that was easy to use and install on a computer, enabling users to talk computer to computer free of charge. MSN messaging, Skype and Gizmo to name just a few.

But these systems required the users to have their computers on and attached to the internet.

As more and more users embraced or took-up the VoIP systems, so manufacturers developed and enhanced such services as Skype. Providing hardware such as the DualPhone 3088, the SMC WiFi phone, which does not require a computer to be switched on, just an internet connection, wired or WiFi. In the UK one mobile service provider (3 Mobile) sells a mobile phone with Skype already installed.

But these VoIP systems, Skype, still require the vast majority of users if they want free calls to have a computer connection to make a call, plus special hardware, headsets, microphones, etc to make a call. The vast majority of people still use normal land line handsets or mobile phones to make calls.

But I have come-up with a system that enables people to keep in contact with me, my business, to keep in contact with my friends in the UK at a cheap rate.

Skype allows subscribers to get a telephone number (SkypeIn) which is a standard UK London number 020 8816 7962 (different countries and regions are also available), and when dialed, will that call be diverted to the Skype account on a internet computer or the DualPhone 3088, no matter where I am, or the Skype user, located in the world. The person dialing the “standard” land line number is unaware that it is an internet number, and is only paying the cost of a standard phone call.

What I have now done is to redirect my UK mobile phone number, 07973178602, to the SkypeIn number, 020 8816 7962, so I pay a small charge, now the call is sent to my Skype account, and if I am sitting next to my DualPhone 3088 here in Malaysia, it will ring, and I will answer it.

If I am not available, and cannot answer the DualPhone 3088, say I am out shopping, visiting or working, Skype will divert the call to my Malaysian mobile phone +6 0174491308, myself paying a small fee (Skype international call) for the privilege.

The next country I land in, perhaps Sri Lanka or Turkey, I get a mobile or use “local” sim card number, redirect Skype to that telephone number, and “Bob’s your uncle“, I have an easy to use and cheap communication system, always in contact.

Now I have another problem, people still want to telephone me from the UK at 6pm in the evening, when I am fast asleep. How can I educate them?

I will just have to switch off the phones, and allow my Skype account to take an answerphone message.

I hope you understand. At least it passed away a couple of hours writing the blog.


  Call me! on Gizmo.

Skype Me™!on Skype

Categories
Uncategorized

There is a start and an end

This morning here in Bukit Mertajam, Malaysia, I am awoken once again by the first call to prayer. The Mosque is a long way from Desa Palma where the house is, but there is only one tree I think between loudspeakers on my eardrums, so there is a direct sound flow. Again he had turned the volume up so much, he was getting feedback, a high whistle.

Laying in bed, knowing that the sun would soon usher away the dark night, I wonder if I am the person he manages to wake up at such an hour. Many times on previous first calls I have looked out of the window, and never seen any lights go on as worshipers prepare themselves. I wonder how many understands him, as most of his talks seem to be in Arabic.

I take three deep breathes to stay calm and not get agitated by such an early awakening (5:30am) Perhaps I may manage to go back to sleep. If I stay calm, the prayers will end, and peace will descend upon me again.

Then the birds start their early morning calls, replacing the night insects chirping.

It seems there is a conspiracy to keep me awake, as the early morning workers on their Honda 50 motorbikes, pop, pop, pop, passed the bedroom window. The odd workers bus, with no exhaust system to silence the noisy diesel engines. The workers are off to start their working day.

Oh Poo Poo, there is nothing for it, but get up, and start my day.

Perhaps Jean-Daniel has added more to the debate we were having on the blog about NLP and PhotoReading. But it seems our dialog may have ended, there is no message.

Maybe there will not be a “Obama and Hillary” alliance, it had ended before it had even started.

I go out into the garden and look for my new friend I gained in the last week.

We have spend ages just looking at each other, there is no conversation, but that is no barrier, there has been no physical contact, we have just being there, being together, confident that we were safe with each other.

I have become quite fond of my new friend. It has not gone too far as I know my friend has their own life to get on with, but I just love being there together just for a while.

I search and search, but my friend is not there. I feel quite empty, lost.

Have I lost my friend?

Have they found another?

I know every thing will eventually come to an end, but this relationship had only just started. There is so much I want to learn, somehow this relationship left right.

I will look again tomorrow. Hopefully I will get a message, some sign that at least they are there.


My friend the lizard

Good friends are hard to come by sometimes.

Categories
PhotoReading

More on Jean-Daniel Antenau’s email

Further to the article and reply in the comments section of the blog to Jean-Daniel Antenau’s email. (click either to read)

Some people may not know what PhotoReading is. The PhotoReading Whole Mind System allows the practitioner or PhotoReader to absorb information at 20,000 – 30,000 WPM (words per minute), into the sub conscious mind. At a conscious level the PhotoReader  is not aware of what they have read, although they may get a feeling, some emotions resulting from this early stage.. This is at the “fast page turning” stage.

It is once the information is absorbed, the page turning, into the inner mind, into the sub conscious mind, that the PhotoReader will activate the absorbed information, which will require normal “input” to gain access to this information, to the purpose and level wanted.

My job as an International Trainer of PhotoReading is to give the participants the skills, confidence and support to do the whole process, the Whole Mind System. 

Some participants want miracles, and expect the information contained within the whole book/s to be in their consciousness, the knowing mind, to be aware of in just a few minutes of turning pages. No, PhotoReading requires work.

A great Italian I work with, Gianni Golfera (click to visit his web site), a man with a great memory, who teaches his skills to the world, and he can remember 256 books, word for word, he has the skills to do that. But, he has had to learn those skills, strategies, he has to work at it. Gianni also PhotoReads when required and is appropriate for his purpose.

I personally do not have the time or desire to argue with, convince people, change their mind about if PhotoReading works or does not work when delivering a course. For some people it is appropriate and works, for others it not appropriate. If it is my own sponsored or arranged course, I will refund their money on the first day should the participant feel that the course is not for them.  If people come with the attitude that PhotoReading will not work, then that is their belief. So be it.

An “example” of PhotoReading can be seen on YouTube (click to view) when Darren Brown PhotoReads the Oxford English Dictionary and gives correctly specific words which are contained on a page and line picked at “random”  by a person.  This program is filmed in the British Library which is said to contain 16 million books. Out of these 16 million books this person is asked to pick one at “random”, which Darren Brown then PhotoReads and answers specific questions.

I would like to say that I love the work of Darren Brown, but he is a Mentalist, an Illusionist, a Magician, he has studied NLP, hypnotism, psychology. Darren is a showman. There is a lot of video editing in this clip, lots of off screen work, with loads of misdirection given to the librarian on and off camera. Darren Brown openly admits that he is using “magic tricks” to make his programs.

Real PhotoReading? No.

Does the American David Copperfield or the British Paul Daniels really make an elephant disappear? No. But some people believe he really has. (click here to see video)

Is Darren Brown debunking PhotoReading? Who cares if the real system works, and it does, as so many of participants off my courses and from other trainers courses have proved around the world.

My next courses will be held in Italy (early March, Rome and Milan contact Gianni Golfera), Bahrain (dates to be confirmed), Turkey (dates to be confirmed for Gaziantep and Istanbul). Email me for dates.

Categories
English Courses Hypnosis Memory Mind Maps NLP PhotoReading

An email reply

This morning I awoke very early again with the first call of the day for prayers from a nearby mosque, and went onto the internet and received the following email from Jean-Daniel Antenau, [email protected], about language and reading.

With nothing better to do, I have posted my reply here, so that it may help others or promote a debate on the subject.

Email from Jean-Daniel Antenau, Quote :-



Hi there,
I just came to get some information about NLP. I’m french and went on some site by Phillip Holt, a friend of yours.
This man pretends reading dictionaries at the speed of 30,000 words/min in order to understand the general meaning of any book in foreign language ! Interesting isn’t it ? I was interested.
So I visited his place on internet and the French translation was… at best funny, at worst not understandable !
Then I visited your page : it was the same pathetic story !
Hey ! Ho !  What is this all about ? Just making fun of everything ? Aren’t there more serious businesses to do of your lives in these times ?
Jean-Daniel Antenau

Unquote

My Reply :-


Dear Jean-Daniel,

Thank you for your input.

 

I had used a Google tool which translates a web page for you. (see web pages in question, www.nlpnow.net).

  

As I have written, and freely admit, I do not speak any other language other than English. I make no excuse, I have a problem with languages. I believe it is due to the learning of language/s before the age of twelve, the development of the brain during this time, that is the Broca’s area, the Wernicke’s area, and other language-processing areas.

 

There is also the motivation, the desire to learn other languages. Again, I freely admit, I do not have the motivation to learn another language, and that is no disrespect to your language French, or your culture.  

 

You can say some people are good a running, so good that they enter and win medals at the Olympics, others have two left feet, and never run, even for a bus.

 

For me to become an Olympic champion in all the languages of the countries I teach in and visit, I would have to spend a lot of time and practice. Perhaps I am not motivated or willing to do so.

 

I have difficulties, so I prefer to spend my time studying the human, the brain, learning skills, teaching skills, and how I can best deliver and share these skills to as many people as I can, all over the world.

 

As I said, I have a problem, I do not speak the languages, French, Italian, Turkish, Arabic, Chinese etc, so I use translators (click to see some of my translators), whom I can trust, or think I can. It is only from positive feedback from people like yourself, that I know if the translation work. In the case of the web pages you mention, your email is the first in five years I have had mentioning the translation problem you have highlighted. Thank you, I appreciate your feedback.

 

At least I have tried to convey or pass-on my skills in PhotoReading, Memory, NLP, Hypnosis Mind Maps to others of other nationalities, cultures, beliefs if they so wish to learn.

 

Yes there are many people who teach the same skills who speak the native languages of French, Italian, Turkish, Arabic and Chinese etc, many who have copied my work, or followed the same route as I have to learn directly from the originators themselves, like Tony Buzan, Paul Scheele, Paul McKenna, Richard Bandler, John Grinder, Ormond McGill, Gianni Golfera, and more, and with their blessing or permission, teach these skills.

 

Yes my work involves laughter, fun, and does I hope my web site http://blog.ohpoopoo.com/, that is in my experience the best way of learning, with emotion, laughter, happiness.

 

At least you laughed. “Hey ! Ho !”

 

Why not go and find a French speaking teacher of PhotoReading, and try the system? Thousands of people all over the world have, and have proved it to themselves that PhotoReading a book, a dictionary helps in their understanding.

 

I have demonstrated this technique often in courses I have given, PhotoReading a book in a language I do not speak, and giving specific answers to questions asked of me. Can you do it? Do you know how to do it? Have you even tried?

 

I doubt it. I have spent many years practising and doing.

 

110 years ago, man could not fly by mechanical means, then two Americans, or a Brazilian, or a British person, whichever history books you have read, put together some twine, wood, fabric, placed an engine in it, and flew some 30 yards/meters.

 

Then man could fly.

 

Since that time, new developments have been developed, new materials have been introduced, so much so that the Airbus 380 has been created, allowing people to go from one side other the world to the other in one hop.

 

It is the same in reading, perhaps you were taught at a tender age of three I expect, how to read, word by word, and that is it, that is how far you have got. You are still flying the Wright brothers aircraft The Flyer, perhaps you should upgrade to the A380, learn from a Certified PhotoReading Trainer like myself, who have helped open minded people to get more out of their life, to learn and stop critising others and their beliefs and abilities.



 

The Wright Brothers first aircraft, The Flyer

Being able to absorb information at such high speed, means people do have more time to spend on the more serious side of modern living.

 

But like me and languages, if you are not willing to try it, you will never know or learn.

 

Again thank you for your input, I really do appreciate comments and feedback, good, bad, constructive or whatever.