It has been a time of celebration on this trip to Malaysia, Christmas 2007, the New Year of 2008, and a birthday.
My sister-in-law Janet, (her Chinese name Ng Mee Chin), who now lives, with her husband Bing, on the same housing estate as we do, having her 70th birthday on the 1st January 2008.
Janet and Bing have three boys, Kin, Keong and Hun, the first two living in Kuala Lumpa, a 4 – 5 hour drive away, and Hun living in Singapore some 10 hour drive, and it seemed that her family would not be back to celebrate her birthday.
The boys had other ideas, and each traveled back to be with her over this period, Hun with his wife Anna and daughter Anjelica, made it over the Xmas period, and we had a birthday party for Janet. Then Keong turned-up two days ago to spend a few days with her. Driving over night, celebrating the midnight change of year in the car, the oldest son, Kin with his wife Li Hoon and children Ching, Shen and Jyun, arrived to spend a few hours of celebration. We had another party.
Janet’s family with birthday cake.
Anna and Anjelica minus Hun with another birthday cake
The Chinese culture holds the family ties very strong, gatherings to be as one group, to be together, which in times gone by was workable, but as the family members begin to spread their wings, moving away from the nest to many far and distant places, for all to be together all at the same time has become a near impossibility, and can lead to disappointments, tension and fallouts.
I remember Christmas’s gone by when I was a small boy.
My mother’s family were very close, her brother and sister, Frank and Dylis lived next door to each other, and their mother lived with them. The family would get together with my two cousins, Avryl and Glynis, plus for the family meal, my cousin’s other Grand Father.
Yet, my father’s family were very close too, and they would also gather for Christmas, the four siblings each with their offspring.
Which family should my father and mother spend Christmas with? Problem.
This was solved by my parents by spending alternative Christmas’s with each family.
Even as a small boy, I sensed and saw when we spent time with my father’s family, my mother would be yearning to be with her family, and when we were with her family, my father being a little out of place with my mother’s family.
Then, one brother or brother-in-law, sister or sister-in-law, had fallen out with another that year, and did not want to be in the same room as each other.
Who should be with whom?
Oh Poo Poo. (click to understand)
It was good to observe Janet’s family as a whole family, and to be included into the family celebrations, to have over the festive period other family members, David (Ng Ying Loong), John (Ng Ying Loon), Amy (Ng Mee Ghor) and Thiang (Ng Ying Thiang) popping in and out.
The last time the whole (nearly) of the NG family got together was for Xmas 1999 and the Millenium (2000) in the Palace of the Golden Horses, Kuala Lumpa.
Ng family Xmas 1999